Quality Products at a Local Store

What mom isn't just a tiny bit obsessed with baby items? I mean, really. Deep down in your heart, whether you'd like to admit it or not, you get a little excited about all things baby! As a mom of a 2-year-old and a 7-month-old, I'm always on the lookout for something that my kids need, something that will make my life easier, or something for a friend that's also a mommy!

One of my favorite places to hit up for all things baby is Babyland in Tupelo. What I love most about Babyland is that it's a local business. The money I spend there goes back into our local economy and supports small business. Another thing I love is that you can get just about anything price-matched! If I find it at a big box store for less, they are always great about meeting the competitor's price. They also offer fair trade items! This means that the women who hand make the items are fairly paid for their labor. You won't find a $10 stuffed animal, but you will find a beautiful, one-of-kind, handmade treasure that supports a hardworking woman somewhere in the world. 

So I was recently given the opportunity to try some new things out from Babyland so that I can tell you all how they are! I am so excited about this! Here's a lovely, professional-grade (not) photo of the goodies:

I get to use the Medela Symphony Breast Pump for 30 days! This is a hospital grade pump that can be rented from Babyland. I pump occasionally (2-3 times per week) for Wittson to have while I'm away from him. I have a Medela Pump in Style Advanced which has always gotten the job done, but I'm super excited to crank this baby up!

Next on the list is some samples from the Mother Love line. These are 100% natural, organic products made from ingredients grown on a farm in Colorado. There are some REALLY neat things that I've learned about this company through their brochure. It's totally worth stopping by Babyland to grab one and read all about it. I have some nipple cream and diaper rash cream to try out.

One of my favorites is Wittson's Swinging on a Star monogrammed onesie. It's 100% cotton and feels very soft and super sturdy. And the dream catcher is just plain ole cute!

I also have a bib. It doesn't have a label so I'm guessing it's a handmade item. I love that it's reversible. It's two in one! One side is mustard yellow with white polka dots and the other side is a cute design (sort of indescribable as you can see in the picture) that's white, blue, red, purple, and green. Although it's a "cute" design, the colors keep me from shying away from using that side.

Another favorite is Stella's Frumpy Rumps dress with a purple "S" monogram on the bow. It's simple, sweet and looks comfortable enough to play in yet dressy enough for church and special occasions. Stella also has a Frozen necklace and matching bow. You can imagine her excitement! I plan to let her where these to her Frozen 2nd Birthday Party!

Soon, I'll be back to share my thoughts after I use these awesome products! 

Pro-lifers should rethink birth control pills, IUDs, and other popular birth control methods.

Before I begin and before you accuse me of being a crazy zealot, hear this. The goal of my words is not to make you angry. My intent is not to shame or condemn anyone. My hope is that I can bring truth to an issue that is muddled with confusion, half truths, and a lot of misinformation. I have prayed over these words countless times. This is a conviction that has weighed so heavily on my heart that each time I thought of writing, my stomach weakened and my heart fluttered. It is even now. I want you to see truth in these words. I want you to see grace in these words and not just a list of medical facts.

The cornerstone of these truths is the sanctity of life. We are made in His image. From the first moments of a newly created life to the last breath of our human bodies, we are His creation--fearfully and wonderfully made. It is through this lens of knowledge and truth that the following words are to be seen.

I don't believe that trying to avoid pregnancy is wrong. God made our bodies rhythmic. We can't become pregnant at all times. I know that not all women's bodies are rhythmic each month, but for the most part our bodies run on a cycle. Before birth control was invented, I'm sure women observed the rhythm of their bodies as a means to avoid and attempt becoming pregnant. Many women do that now. I believe that if God didn't want us to have any control over if and when we have children, He would've made our bodies in such a way that pregnancy was achievable at all times. Avoiding pregnancy isn't the issue, it's how we avoid it that can be dangerous.

So this is my foreword: trying to avoid becoming pregnant isn't wrong and the means by which we do this should honor the sanctity of life and God, the Creator of all life--big and small, planned for and unplanned for, wanted and unwanted.

Our Story

A few months before Tony and I were to be married, Amendment 26 was to be on the upcoming voting ballot. This amendment stated that the right to life begins at conception which would make abortions illegal in the state of Mississippi. Amongst the controversy of the amendment was the discussion of what the passing of the amendment would mean for birth control methods. As it was, Tony and I were beginning our discussions about what we planned to do about birth control once we were married.

While listening to a discussion about Amendment 26 on a radio program, I heard an individual state that the use of intrauterine devices (IUDs) and Depo Provera shots (and the like) would be put to a stop if the amendment was passed and that although use of "the Pill" would not be effected by the passing of the amendment, it can still cause abortions.

What? I wondered why IUDs and "the shot" would be nixed, and even more importantly how birth control pills can cause abortions. Per usual, I wanted to do the research for myself.

What I found left me dumbfounded, for lack of a better word. I was shocked. I was intrigued. I was mad.

The person on the radio that I doubted was right.

I first read the enclosed pamphlet that comes with all prescribed birth control pills. I read every single small-print word. I confirmed what I read by doing more research online and I found the same mechanisms of action for every type of pill. Every birth control pill has three mechanisms of action. The primary mechanism of action is to inhibit ovulation. This is no problem since it is actually contraceptive in nature. Contraception means literally no conception. When the primary mechanism works and keeps a woman from ovulating, there is no child conceived, therefore no threat to a life. There are two other mechanisms of action for the pill. It also thickens the cervical mucus to make the travel of sperm to an egg difficult. Here again, no harm. This mechanism is not threatening to a conceived life. It's in the other mechanism of action that the danger lies. Birth control pills alter the endometrium (lining of the uterus) so that a conceived life cannot get the oxygen and nutrients it needs to continue to grow, which results in the body expelling the already conceived life. This mechanism is abortive.

My pamphlet in my birth control pills that I got from a doctor at my pre-wedding gynecologist appointment that everyone urges you to make 3 months before your wedding didn't explain to me what these mechanisms of action actually meant. Why not?! Why would they print, "The mechanism of action inhibits ovulation and also alters cervical mucus and causes changes to the endometrium" without going into further detail? Isn't that the purpose of pharmaceutical information pamphlets? Shouldn't I be given all the information I need about a drug I'm putting into my body? According to them, no. The further explanation is in a Physician's Desk Reference.

Here's the truth. If scientists, doctors, and others of the like can change the definition and what we know of "pregnancy" to something that only happens after implantation, then they can sell more drugs that are potentially abortive and devices that are abortive. They even call them by the name of "contraceptives". They can manipulate people into being desensitized to the sanctity of life.

When a sperm penetrates an egg, a new individual is created. A completely unique, different-from-any-person-ever-created-and-different-from-any-person-that-will-over-be-created, person. The DNA is already constructed. Eye color, hair color, gender, features from each parent are already designated. All that's left is for the person to grow, be born, and continue growing. If a swab of DNA were collected from a person immediately after he/she was conceived and again at the age of 99, it would be identical. Human life, pregnancy, begins with conception. Anything that endangers life after conception is abortive.

I know that many people buy into the fact that the chances of ovulating while taking the Pill, sperm being able to reach the egg and for conception to happen, and then for the body to expel the life are small. I was one of those people (I will tell you more about that later). Pulling away and looking at this possibility from a distance does make this chance seem small. But how can purposefully (even if it is unintentional) altering the body so that a life is terminated ever be considered a small possibility?

You know the Morning After Pill (not speaking of RU-486) that nearly every pro lifer and Christian stands against? The birth control pill does the exact same thing. The MAP simply does what the BCP has already done to your body. And yes, the commercial and other information about the MAP says that it doesn't terminate an already existing pregnancy. That's because the creators and marketers of the BCP and the MAP are only recognizing pregnancy as everything that happens after implantation. In fact, if a woman suspects that she could become pregnant as a result of unprotected sex (due to the pills not being taken as scheduled or other means), she can call her doctor and have him/her tell her what dosage (depending on the brand of the pill) of her BCP to take to act as an emergency "contraceptive". A ready made morning after pill. Implanon methods and patch methods have the same mechanism of action.

IUDs, the Depo Provera shot, and other methods of the like are abortive. IUDs and "the shot" do not inhibit ovulation in any way; its primary mechanism of action is to alter the lining of the womb so that it won't be receptive to the conceived child. The sole purpose of these methods is to create a hostile environment so that a conceived life may be expelled from the body. This is why the passing of Amendment 26 would have put a stop to these forms a birth control--they are primarily abortive.

If your head is reeling, you aren't alone. After finding all of this information that I had never heard talked about, I felt deceived. Why isn't the mechanisms of action in these birth control methods disscussed? Why does it feel as if they are hidden? I know that there are so many who have used these methods with no intent to harm life. This is why I want to make others aware of the dangers of these popular methods. It's almost as if we just use these methods because we're "supposed to". It's just something that many do without really thinking about it.

So, after I researched and learned all of this, I shared it with Tony. We were both surprised by the truth mainly because we had never heard anyone talk about it. We were also scared. We were going to be getting married in a matter of months. The thought of having a baby very soon after we got married terrified us. We knew that we were still kids ourselves in a lot of ways. We researched other methods of birth control that were purely contraceptive in nature and found a plethora of helpful information. At the same time, I was also trying to find any way possible that taking the BCP would be okay even with our pro life beliefs. I was grasping at straws. I was searching high and low. One day I found an article written by a Christian about birth control (one of many). He went through every form of birth control (everything from none at all to abortion) and discussed the mechanisms of actions and his thoughts about each. When he wrote about the BCP, he was honest about what it did but then continued to say that since the chance of potential and purposeful abortion was so small, it should be a fairly safe option for Christian marriages.

There it was! What I had been searching for all along! Finally, I had the "okay" to use the pill. And so we did. For the first three months of our marriage, I took a birth control pill each day.  Each day that I swallowed a tiny, white pill, my heart felt heavy. It felt sad. For three months, I swallowed my convictions with that tiny pill. I swallowed what I had learned about its potential danger to a brand new life.

One day, it was a day in September, I was coming to the end of a month's supply of the pill and needed to go get my refill. I don't know what was different about this day, but this was the day that I decided that I had had enough. I couldn't ignore it anymore. I just could not keep doing it all the while knowing that I was potentially forcing a conceived life from my womb. When Tony got home that day from work, I told him how I felt. I had my assumptions of what I thought he'd say. I knew he would be nervous, but I also knew he loved God and he loved me. I knew that he was a fair man. I also knew that he was a human man that had the same fears, both for not using the pill and for using it, that I did. So after I told him everything and my reasons for it, he simply said, "Then I think we know what we have to do." And that was it. We stopped using the pill and we have never looked back or regretted it for a single moment. I don't know if in that three months a life was lost due to me using the birth control pill, and there is no way to know. All I can do is hope and pray that there wasn't and lay it at the feet of Jesus. There is no shame, guilt, or condemnation with Him.

A person is either pro life or not. There aren't different shades or degrees of being pro life. There's valuing the sanctity of life from the very first moment, and then there is the alternative. Again, I don't mean for these words to hurt or to shame or to condemn anyone. I simply feel an urgency to show the truth that is hidden from so many. I know that there are so many that have been using these forms of birth control without the full knowledge of what they do. My heart's desire is for you to know the truth and respond to it.

Now, I would like to share some methods of birth control that are solely contraceptive and don't pose any harm to a life. Abstinence, rhythm method, calendar method, and barriers are all contraceptive. When each is practiced faithfully and accurately, they work wonderfully! I encourage you to research them more and learn more about what would fit your marriage best. I know you're undoubtedly thinking, "Yeah, sure. 'They work,' says the woman with two children 17 months apart!"  Let me be candid with you. When you are faithful and deliberate about the chosen method, it works (of course, nothing is fail proof--except for abstinence--just as none of the methods we talked about earlier are)! If you get lax and don't really pay attention, congratulations, you get a Stella! If you think, but aren't really sure you know what day it is on your beginning-to-return-to-normal cycle after having a baby but don't take proper measures, yay for you, you'll be getting a Wittson soon! I don't mean to embarrass you or myself, I just want you to see that it can be done and it can be done well. I have several good friends who use one of these methods in their marriages and have done a great job at it (meaning they have avoided and achieved pregnancy as they attempted).

Let's end with a sweet note. Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward. Psalm 127:3
My prayer is that we strive to honor the Lord with our bodies and our decisions. May His creation be uplifted, celebrated, and revered.


Further reading:
Here is an article that is much more in depth, informative, and all around better than mine. It addresses these issues from a Biblical perspective.

5 Reasons We Won't Let Marriage Work Anymore

DISCLAIMER: If you have not read the original post, "5 reasons marriage doesn't work anymore," please do so before reading this. It will all make much more sense. And, yes, the title for the original post is not capitalized. For shame!

There is a popular blog post drifting around the internet at the moment. Thankfully, it holds the illusive secret to why marriage seems to not be working out for a lot of people. It points out that it worked great for our great grandparents, grandparents, and maybe even our parents, but not for us. We've all been wondering what the problem is, because surely we as humans aren't to blame! So, why has our society seemingly outgrown marriage? Why won't marriage fit us anymore? The problem is simply this: marriage hasn't changed and people haven't changed. Marriage calls us to uphold another person above ourselves. We are humans. Selfish, arrogant, self-serving, self-bettering, me-me-me humans! So naturally, marriage won't fit us. Let's take a look at the original blog poster's 5 reasons marriage doesn't work anymore (as if marriage just recently stopped "working").

1. Sex becomes almost non-existent.
I lol-ed at this one. Firstly, if you believe sex is the most important aspect of marriage (as the original poster does), you are in for a world of disappointment after disappointment. There are a few large pieces that make up the most important aspects of marriage. Sex is not one of them. It is, however, metaphorically relative to the glue that holds these large pieces together. Therefore, it is obviously important! Just not the most important.

OP (that's what we're calling him for short) does have a very accurate perspective for why sex is important for a husband and wife. As he says, it connects them like no other thing can, resulting in the sacredness of it. But, when you have children that don't sleep or nap very well and require the majority of the energy and attention of both parents, "you no longer look at your partner wanting to rip their clothes off" at the end of the day. Please don't misunderstand me, this is absolutely no excuse for the neglect of intimacy with your spouse. This is simply reality. There are seasons of life. The season of parenthood just doesn't have the same volume of intimacy as the season of newlywed bliss or empty-nesting (I don't know this for certain on the latter, but my husband and I are hoping I'm right). My point is this, if your aren't having as much sex as you think you and your spouse should be having, talk lovingly and graciously with them about it. This is an issue with us as people, not an issue with the sanctity of marriage! There is no pre-installed sex clock that starts counting down from the wedding ceremony that activates and puts an end to sex in marriage.

Now this is the real kicker. OP's reason for why sex becomes non-existent in marriage is that "Everywhere you look, there's pictures of men and women we know half naked - some look better than your husband or wife. So it becomes desirable. It's in your face every single day and changes your mindset." Once again, this must be marriage's fault, not the faultiness of the human heart and the absence of a heart that wants to resist temptation.

People, if you find yourself lusting after ANYONE besides your spouse, remove yourself from the situation. Delete facebook, instagram, twitter, or get rid of your entire computer if need be. Stop spending time with that person at work, or at the gym, or in the park where you walk your dog everyday, etc. Whatever the scenario is, put an end to it. This is not a problem with marriage; this is a problem with the human heart and its resistance to commitment and true love for one person for the duration of earthly life together.


2. Finances cripple us.
Did you know that strain on a marriage due to finances is a new thing? No really, it is. The cost of living has gone up. Our parents, grandparents, and great grandparents never had to worry about keeping a roof over their family's head, or how to fill their bellies, or how to properly clothe themselves and their children. It was smooth sailing until recently.

"It's extremely difficult to find a job that can provide an income that will help you live comfortably while paying all of these bills-especially not in your mid 20s." Do you think it was comfortable for our fore-parents living in drafty houses, trying to make a feast with flour, canned fish, and sugar, or whatever happened to be in the pantry, and having to explain to their children why they had to wear last year's pants that now exposed their ankles and coats that had a few holes in them? Financial hardship has been around since the beginning of Creation. It isn't marriage's fault that you are having some financial stress in your marriage. It may not be your fault either; it just is a part of life that happens from time to time and hopefully doesn't make up the entirety of your lives together.

OP claims that because of this newly found thing called financial hardship, he could no longer go out to dinner, had to skip out on anniversary gifts, and couldn't take vacations. There you have it, thankfully our grandparents got to do all these things which resulted in lasting marriages and the birth of our parents and ultimately us. Thank you, weekly visits to restaurants, lavish gifts, and exotic getaways. I wouldn't be alive if not for you.

If we really are "trying to live the way our grandparents and parents did in a world that has put more debt on our plate than ever before," then pick yourself up by the bootstraps, batten down the hatches, and work together to wisely manage your money in way that gets the job done for your family. Putting an end to your marriage will not result in the disappearance of financial trouble, nor does marriage cause financial trouble. Some of the time, WE are the ones the cause financial trouble for ourselves. But, there will always be bills to pay and fun things that you have to skip out on to meet your responsibilities. Welcome to adulthood.


3. We're more connected than ever before, but completely disconnected at the same time.
Marriage, how dare you create smartphones that have resulted in the quick convenience of text messaging and the time-swallower named social media.If you barely speak face to face with your spouse, once again, this a problem with YOU, not the institution of marriage. If you aren't excited to speak to your spouse at the end of the day because you've been texting him/her all day, can you please explain to me how the institution of marriage is somehow to blame? If electronics are causing trouble in your marriage and handicapping communication in your marriage, this is an issue that is up to you to fix. I'm not sure that there's more to say about this one. This is a no-brainer. It isn't marriage's fault that you don't care more about your spouse than to be satisfied with 3-word sentences and minimal verbal exchanges.


4. Our desire for attention outweighs our desire to be loved.
Our culture is all about what makes us feel good. If you feel good about yourself, who cares what you're doing or who you're hurting. Life is all about what makes you happy.
Even the title of the "reason" is enough to see that it isn't marriage that is no longer working, it's people that are no longer working on their marriages.


5. Social media just invited a few thousand people into bed with you.
No, my friend. You just invited a few thousand people. Social media isn't a mandate. On this point, I agree with everything OP says. He didn't mention, however, that marriage didn't change. People did. We have made social media a part of our identity. If we don't share pictures of what we're doing or post about what brand of milk we bought at the store, it didn't really happen. You don't have to spend what should be precious time with your spouse and family with the whole cyber world. You don't have to air your dirty laundry on social media. Once again, this isn't an issue started by marriage, it's an issue started my people.



I realize that this isn't as grace-filled of a post as it probably could be, but I am so tired of hearing how marriage can no longer work for people of the modern world. Maybe it's people of the modern world that will no longer work for marriage.

The Biggest Surprise of Motherhood

On August 6, 2013, I found out that I was a Mommy, and for the next eight and a half months I marveled at the capabilities of my body. I loved that my body was the perfect home for a tiny, forming life to develop and grow until it could thrive on its own. I wondered how this not-much-bigger-than-the-size-of-a-period-at-the-end-of-a-sentence baby could send my body into throes of agony and illness like clockwork each day. My heart raced when she kicked her feet and bounced my belly with hiccups. I embraced my growing (and growing and growing) waist each week. I've always known I would adore being pregnant. It's a no-brainer. Of course expecting a child is beautiful.

On April 25, 2014, I delivered my gorgeous daughter. I made it through the hospital stay, the first night home, and the first two weeks. It's still a blur. I probably couldn't give a good recount of those days due to sleep deprivation and constant adrenaline. But when I emerged from the new parent fog around the start of the third week of her life, something happened that I never thought in a million, billion, gazillion years would...

I'm sort of in love with my "mommy body". 

I know...I just rocked your world, right?! Was that as unexpected for you as it was for me? It's one thing to love your body while harboring a baby, but to love your body after baby?

When I really looked at myself in the mirror for the first time after giving birth, my immediate first reaction was to gawk at my wider set hips and the stretch marks covering my stomach from my navel down. But, something crept into my thoughts and quietly placed those visions of ugliness in the back of my mind. A meek little voice started to speak. 

"Look...the love that grew inside your body was too big for it to hold. She left permanent marks there that say I was here."

"Look...you labored to bring her out into the world. Your hips won't ever go back to their original position. Now, she has a comfy little place to sit when she's too big to cradle in your arms."

As I examined my new body, I couldn't help but let a few tears escape. My stomach will never again be flat. My skin will never again be free of flaws. My hips will never again fit into the jeans that are hanging in my closet. I was not mourning these changes. I was overwhelmed with pride. I'm a mommy, and my body is proof.

This mommy body has never failed me. After a night of minimal sleep, it jumps right out of bed to care for my baby and can take on the fifteen to twenty-hour day ahead. It can calm my upset baby with just its smell. It can snuggle my tired baby and induce her deep, restful sleep. It gives her the life-sustaining milk that she needs to grow and thrive. How could I hate, or even dislike, this body?

I have never been satisfied with my body. It's a very common struggle for the fairer gender. I've spent years, at less ten, disliking my body and focusing on what I wished was different about it on a daily basis. Since having Stella, I've never felt as good about myself and my body as I do now. I've never been proud of this body, until now. I've never looked in the mirror and noticed something a like about my body, until now.

I love that my body is the only thing I need to care for my baby. My body was the place where God knit her together cell by cell. He made my body strong enough to push her from within me out into the world around us. He gave my body the ability to nourish her. She needs me. She loves me. Even so small, I can see in her eyes that she knows it's me that she trusts to meet her needs. When she's hungry and begins to fuss, all I have to do it pick her up and she becomes almost instantly calm. She knows that her needs will be met even before I offer myself to her. 

The bond that we share because of her need for my body is almost indescribable. How can I explain the feeling I get when we lock eyes as she's feeding or when I can see her eyes smiling at me when she's feeding? She knows I'll take care of her. I can feel her trust in me when she lays peacefully and softly strokes my bare skin with chubby little fingers and pushes her tiny little feet through my long hair while she eats. This body has been divinely designed to care for this baby. How, oh how dear listener, could I ever hate this body? 

This body is my sacrifice to God. I will give of myself and my body to Him for all the children he has already predestined to be mine. I will use this body to raise up arrows to sent into the world to pierce the heart of the enemy and battle for His Kingdom and His Glory. Motherhood is my mission field. Just the way He knit my sweet Stella together, He knit me together for this purpose. 

Please, beloved sister, don't hate your body. It has been crafted by the Great Artist. You have been made for something far more wonderful than you know. Whatever the purpose He has planned for you, no mistake has been made. 

Mommies, don't feel less beautiful since birthing that sweet baby of yours. Love the things about your body that are proof of growing and caring for life. Let them be a reminder of how wonderful it is and how great a privlege it is to be the vessel He uses to create life. 

Love yourselves, because He and everyone else already does.

All is Fair in Love, Right?

Last Sunday, Tony and I celebrated our 1st wedding anniversary! It was so wonderful. I can't believe it's been a whole year, and on the other hand I can't believe it's been only a year. A few days ago, before our anniversary, I went back to the passage that we selected as our "marriage scripture". Sort of like our motto. We chose Colossians 3:12-17. If you haven't yet or can't recall that passage, please go read it. It's so beautiful. Of course after reading this you'll picture the relationship between a husband and wife. Granted, it's so easy to see in this passage. But do you know what other relationships it's great for? Parent-child. Sibling-sibling. Friend-friend. And so forth, and so forth. Really, the people Paul and Timothy are writing to is the Church. They're writing to the believers; to the Christ-followers. He's writing to me. And I hope you can include yourself in their audience. So the relationship we are looking at here is christian-to-christian. He is laying out how we should treat one another. 

They day I re-pondered our passage, though, I didn't get past verse 14. So maybe I'll reflect on the other verses with you another day. So, I'll be honest. The day I gave these verses a gander, Tony and I had been arguing. I tell you this only to further the goal of my message, because otherwise I am a very private person and don't believe the insides of my marriage are any of your business (I mean that in the most polite way possible). So the day after this incident, I sat down with my Bible. I thought, "Our anniversary is in a couple of days. I'll give our marriage passage another visit." I believe the most clear way to learn from God and hear from God is His Word. And He gently, but sternly, showed me a little more of myself that day. As I began reading that passage, the "list" of words caught my attention. These are easy words-words we learn in elementary school. But do we really remember what they mean? I'll write verse 12 here for your reference.

Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.

Easy, right? Hmmm... So I decided to look in the dictionary and find the exact meaning of these words. What exactly am I expected to clothe myself in? 

1. compassion-sympathize; to bear, suffer; sympathy of others' distress together with a desire to alleviate it

That was unexpected... Sure, sympathy was expected. But sympathy PLUS a desire to alleviate that person's distress? Did I show a desire to alleviate my husband's distress that previous night?

2. kindness-of a sympathetic or helpful nature; of a forbearing nature: gentle

Gentle.......uuummmmm.. Was I very gentle towards him?

3. humility-not proud or assertive; reflecting, expressing, or offered in a spirit of submission

Ouch.... okay, this is starting to hurt a bit, Lord.

4. gentleness-free from harshness, sternness, or violence

Again with the "gentleness"? ....I guess I was pretty harsh. But I had a right to be angry! ....Right?

5. patience-bearing pains or trials calmly or without complaint: steadfast despite opposition, difficulty, or adversity

And You save the biggest bomb for last, don't ya?! 

Okay, so I was none of these things during our argument. Not only am I called as a wife to be these things for my husband, I'm a Follower called to be these things to my fellow Brother. Can you see the recurrence in these words? Sympathy, forbear, gentle. Isn't that how Jesus lived? Isn't that how He treats us when we fail Him? I kept trying to rationalize my behavior and the only thing I felt whispered to my heart over and over again was, "But what about when you come to Me? Do I hold these things against you?"

(Big sigh.....) No, He doesn't hold these things against us. Which moved me along to the next verse.

Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. (13)

Wwwwhhhhhhyyyyyyyy? Why does this have to be so haaaaarrrrdd?! And then it hit me! It DOESN'T have to be so hard. The limits of forgiveness are self-imposed. I don't have to set a limit on how far my forgiveness goes. I SHOULDN'T set a limit on how far my forgiveness goes! Why, you ask. Because there is no limit on how far Christ's forgiveness goes. How relieving. How freeing! I don't have to hold on to my anger. I can freely forgive because I am forgiven. How sweet it is, dear one, to be free.

And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. (14)

Love is the key here. I can have all of these things previously listed, but they will not be held together unless I have love to cover them with. The love that is spoken of here is the love that pours from Christ into me, and from me to others. Without the love of Christ, I have nothing. 

So let's recap:

We have been forgiven through Christ. Since we are forgiven, we should have the love of Christ in us. We need love to forgive others. Handy-dandy thing, because we SHOULD forgive others because we have been forgiven. And to go along with that, we should be showing those around us compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. This is a tall order. You can't do it by your own will. Call on Him to help you. You may be surprised by what He shows you in return.

Being Purified is Purely Painful

We want a Christ who pardons, but do we want a Christ who purifies?

This question was in the sermon notes handout last Sunday. The sermon was titled "The Cross and Christian Discipline (Part 2): What About Church Disputes?" Immediately you think of a split amongst attenders of a specific church building, but the Church is more than that. We, the believers, are the Church. The bride of Jesus (my heart swoons every time). So what happens when we become angry at one another or hurt by one another? As Christ-followers we are called to a different standard. It's a high standard. It's a hard standard. And it isn't what we would call "fair" all the time. I won't go into the whole sermon here, you can listen to the Brook Hills podcast for that. 

What I want to reflect on here is that question that jumped off of the paper handout and punched me right between the eyes. Wow. 

Do we want a Christ who pardons? Of coarse! Our eternity rests on a Christ who PARDONS! If He didn't pardon, we would be hopeless and destitute. We love that part of Christ. It's the part that works out well for us. But what about the parts of Christ that don't sit so comfortably with us? Do we love those parts? Do we want a Christ who purifies? We sing songs during worship with lyrics that request this purifying, we pray and ask for purification, but do we realize exactly what we're asking for? Most of the time (for me anyways) that's a big, fat NO! 

What imagery comes to mind when you think of the word purify? I imagine a big, tall waterfall. Really it's more like a stream-fall, if that word even exists. It's clear waters gently tumble over the edge and fall down into stream below. And I'm standing under that falling water-arms stretched wide, head tilted back receiving the clean water from above. Nice setting, huh? But being made into the image of Christ isn't so serene. Being purified by Christ isn't comfortable. It's down right hard! It isn't natural for a human being to portray characteristics and actions that mirror those of a the perfect Savior. 

So what does it mean to be purified by Christ? Silver doesn't come in an original state of 100% silver. There are other minerals in it as well. So to be purified, it is put into very high temperatures so that the other trace elements will separate from the silver and rise to the top so as to be easily removed. This "junk" is called dross. Get where I'm going here? When you find yourself in a situation where it would be so easy to act or react like you want, but you chose instead to mirror Christ, you are being purified. You must be made uncomfortable (high temperatures) so that you have to consciously chose to be like Christ (have your other junk removed from the surface)-because I can pretty much guarantee that it will not be second nature. Tony and I have a little funny that we say to one another when we're showing our rears and acting like humans usually do-"Hunny, your dross is showing." When we see the junk of our human hearts rise to the surface, we have a choice. Do we remove it and become more purified, or do we do the easy thing and give in to our human nature?

Being purified is a hard process to go through. It's also a long process-lasting the rest of your life here on earth. Ask Him for strength. He will give it. Ask Him for patience. He will give it. Ask Him for more of Himself to be present in you. Beware: He will give it. So, let's honestly ask ourselves today: Do we want a Christ who purifies?

"Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you." (Ephesians 4:31, 32 ESV)

*I know, it's a real zinger.

Hello there...

I've always thought bloggers were cool. They always have neat stories to tell, fabulous recipes and crafts, or a clearly anointed thought/message to share. I'm sorry to say that I won't be a cool blogger. This will simply be a gallimaufry of my thoughts, ideas, and sometimes the if-I-don't-spill-this-out-of-me-I'm-going-to-go-bonkers issues of my life. You are more than welcome to follow along, but please know that place doesn't exist to satisfy anyone. This place is for me. It's my desire that maybe a few will be uplifted, or inspired, or perhaps to just feel like they aren't alone. But it isn't the goal...for now. For now, I just need a place to share dump the things that are in my heart and mind. Do not misunderstand, Christ is my cornerstone and forevermore. He is my patient listener. He takes me into His arms and quiets my chaos. He takes the bad things away and leaves me filled to the brim. I don't need this place; I just want it. Writing, I think, is therapeutic. Call it the teacher in me, but it is. In a nutshell, I just need to literally (metaphorically, if you want to be exact) spew the innards of my mind.

And so Vita in Cristo is born! Vita in Cristo (so difficult to spell it without an "h") is Italian for Life in Christ. I love my new last name. Is so.....swirly, if you will. It's beautiful all spelled out, it's fun to say, and it's just basically one of the best words ever. But what I love most about it is the first four letters. Vita. Life. I will confess, I didn't notice this on my own.

Tony's grandfather married a lovely woman in 2000 named Terry Marquis(very French) Vitagliano. She passed away a few months before our wedding from cancer. I met her twice, once in high school for Tony's graduation and again the Christmas before Tony and I married. The first was brief and not very in depth. But the second time, I was one of her's. She made me feel as though I'd been her family for years. I got to spend hours sitting next to her on Tony's aunt's couch. She was so weak and tired (and one of the most beautiful women I've ever seen to be truthful), but it in NO way dampened her spirits. Towards our departure she told me that she would do everything she could and give every ounce of fight left in her to be at our wedding. Her own granddaughter got married a month after we did, so she had two weddings approaching. "I'm a Vitagliano. It's right there in my name: Vita! Life! That's what I want-life!" She was a tough fighter, but God is a harder fighter. And he wanted her home before our wedding date. And boy, was she ready to go see Him! That's actually what the rest of our conversation consisted of-how happy she was to be so close to Home. Anyway, that's who taught me this wonderful thing about my name. And I will never forget her words.

So we have life. We are born into this world with physical life. But to truly receive life of the soul, we must find it in Christ. The One who took our sin upon His sinless self and gave His life so that we may be reunited with God, the Father. That's a very wordy sentence. It inhabits a lot of ideas that are hard to get our finite minds wrapped around. I love that sentence. I also love the simplicity of these ideas. God made you-He already knew who you were while he was making the sun and the flowers. He knew your name, he knew what color eyes you have, and he also knew you'd be human. Bleh. Human. We are all weak and broken humans. So He sent Jesus to die for our sins so that we would be made clean. There is the life. Eternal life. I just wrote and deleted about as much as is already written in this post to further explain this. If you would like this to be further explained, please ask me. I would be overjoyed to share with you everything I wrote and deleted, and more!

So I am redeemed. I have found my life, and it is in Christ that I live.
"I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me." Galatians 2:20